Put on your thinking cAPP – set aside questions, explore mine – search for an elusive answer, ‘to be at peace with my piece’.
Really, can there ever be such a state of mind, for any writer – much less their readers, to be a peace with a point of view, thought process or arrival at cerebral destinations where understanding becomes as plain as a chair, where knowing is no more complex than cozy old sweaters, where being alive is perfectly proven by soft touch, from kind hands?
That I could write this, to be happy with it, perplexes – often wonderering about my last piece, my next piece – this piece, I always set out to create my best piece. Not a good piece, but my best.
But like any walk on a path, there are diversions, distraction and obstacles. Time is neither ally or friend – pressure of self (as proxy for the audience) says ‘no, that’s not good enough’, and I say ‘not good’, ‘not good enough yet’.
So it goes. In my head – no idea if other writers face this, admit this or blend foreboding mixed with self-doubt like me, or that I might share their struggle. And for what purpose should I write to you, my faithful readers, today?
What do you want, what do you need, what do you expectfrom me?
Smooth your morning traffic-jagged-edge, quietly meditate – take moments of silence, walk my walk, witness my sunrise, share my plain ride beyond this edge. Then descend – to reality, staring there at your desk, from your chair – wondering why you are there.