OF COURSE WE TAKE IT PERSONALLY
Monday, August 1, 2022
Don’t take it personally.
That’s what we get told, so we toughen up, get thicker skin …
Really, seriously – don’t take it personally?
They say, “Don’t take it personally, It’s not about you.”
But what if it is?
Some people hear critique and ignore it. Some deny they’ve heard it, and many (I confess to decades of doing this) practice selective hearing – zeroing in on what we want to hear, what serves us, what had the best chance of delivering the win (or sale, or approval) we are after.
When we are beset with criticism, we usually aren’t calm enough to set it aside for analysis later because we react defensively. Sure, we hide it or hold to the illusion that nobody notices, but it leaks out in our actions, words, mood, and how many doors we slam that day.
Pushing back, reacting, or taking it has much to do with the circumstances/facts/location of when and why criticism is heaped upon us.
We can recognize the difference between the bully and someone who genuinely wants to help us improve what we’re doing.
If we pause long enough to be clear on that, we can distinguish who is a friend and who is a foe.
There are plenty of people to work with who want what is best for us, for them too, for the team or the joint-venture – they want to collaborate and cooperate. And they never get mistaken for a bully. Bullies are a lot like that kid’s parable about a wolf in sheep’s clothing, and we don’t have to be very clever because they usually ‘out’ themselves.
Reader feedback:
Great read this morning Mark, DH, Calgary, AB
Wow! This is great. We have so much. That fact gets obscured by the heat and the turmoil that seeps in through the cracks. We are by no means perfect and our past is dismal to say the least. But I doubt there is a better place to be in the world today than Canada, HM, Calgary, AB
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