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UP A CREEK, FOUND A PADDLE; the self-love love letter

Friday, Dec. 20, 2019
 
 
Why write?
 
I have to.
 
But nobody is standing over me, nobody is forcing anyone, so why?
 
I have to.
 
I can do anything, or without anything – I could be a monk in a monastery in required silence; that, I think I could do, but going a day without writing?
 
No.
 
I have to.
 
I have to write something. Sure, I want it to be something good. I doubt there is anyone who calls themselves a writer who wants any less – but of course, we write bad pieces, leave half-shite pieces unfinished and sometimes share/publish things with obvious glaring errors in so many technical ways.
 
But here’s da ‘ting, I want it to be good. Every time, every day, I want to write well – want to write something that matters to me. That might matter to someone else, that might help me, or that might help someone else. But the reality of it is that time, opportunity, and focus are recipe ingredients not always available in the correct proportion on the day I want to spit my best idea or deepest pain onto a page.
 
I feel better than I have in years. Not because my situation suddenly got great, or better, or I won a lottery – but I’ve done some things, proven some things, which I knew could be done, but I lost faith in myself for a while there. Not sure if it was any particular date, but most of the last six to ten years have been a blur of ineffectiveness in many things, woven with some personal issues, some family ‘stuff’, and business challenges.
 
That’s not a pity-party description, but rather an explanation of what I now see as ‘the way it has been for too bloody long.’ Taking charge of that is no simple task, but undoubtedly not an impossible one.
 
I don’t have anywhere close to a complete solution to my problems – I expect most of us don’t, but what I have right now more than I can recall in recent memory, I have a grip on the problem.
 
Maybe that was necessary.
 
Or inevitable.
 
Anyway, I’m here.
 
Facing it.
 
Troubles, as in solving problems, is something we all have a love-hate relationship with; we hate that we have the problem, we hate that it took this long to get this far, we hate that there is a long stretch of rough road still ahead.
 
Still, we love the feeling of knowing and growing, the love of decisiveness, and the determination of love.
 
Love the problem.
 
Love the solution.
 
Love yourself.
 
Then, I think we are ready to love the world and love others. Until then, “stuck here in this shite” is the best way to describe it whether we have a paddle or not.
 
 
 
Reader feedback: 
MORE WATER, LESS FOOD, MORE CHANGES, BETTER LIFE
This was a very impactful read for me this morning. Walking around in a fog as of late, your article gave me some food for thought. Thank you Mark. Thank you for the clarity I was looking for. Now to plan the vision for 20/20 that I want to accomplish and the goals I need to choose to make it there. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year Mark. May you be blessed during this Holiday season as you have blessed others!, MJ, Calgary, AB 
Sage Advice - Thanks  I will definitely try this strategy. I know I owe you some face-time.  I just put it on my 2020 list for January. Have a Merry Christmas and a healthy and happy New Year! , SC, Chestermere, AB



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Mark Kolke, Realtor, MaxWell South Star Realty

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