RESEMBLE THAT WHICH CAUSES TREMBLE
Friday Feb. 4, 2011
today’s Musing written and published from Cranston in south- east Calgary, near the Bow River valley
Morning walk: 7C/45F, overcast, calm, all that snow is making so much slush it causes concern where all the water will flow – this signs down by the lagoon say ‘warning thin and unstable’; perhaps a label that fits other things in life sometime. Gusta enjoyed the deep snow down there, especially burrowing her snout to get a good face-wash.
Writing this down makes it real, I can and I will live it once, write it once – live it twice, that would be nice but again, I said, moving on . . .
Kind, supportive, hello’s from friends yesterday – thank you, I’m OK; notion I’m suffering from absence of emotion locomotion is interesting but, really - no need for commotion. Lingering tendrils of love vines and love lines - snipped, tiny trailers - in atrophy mode now though the sleep cycle is still in need of spoke repair.
In morning grog-state, clear and calm, real things get clearer – always, than they were the night before. Mind opens, like a store in the morning, ready to receive visitors and new goods – morning’s fresh chill wafts, makes the coffee heat so welcome – time to open windows again.
Truth - not told in drabs, in dribs, in fears and tears – it leaks, flows in and out of things like stray wet spilled on a floor that’s not level – meandering trickles, like a new creek in spring, trying to find it’s way to the sea you see, trying to let gravity take it quests to flow. When we think it through, it’s not questing anything at all – it’s just gravity.
Shrink, hide, retreat? No time for wallowing, no struggle to find reason or explanation or solution where none exists. A futile exercise to prove no-fault. Need to go out, get out, start again. I can, it will be easy in ways I think difficult and difficult in ways I think easy – I know those, understand no one is going to create what I want, I have to create it myself. What now? I can’t go back to make a new start, but I can start over, make new beginnings.
Failed relationships (no need to remind me how many – too many, failed); each experience has been bit of a new world being born, world of possibility lived there. Sometimes it was a candle which could only burn so long, sometimes I felt I’d found a candle warehouse. Some of these little worlds were real, some were illusion, some were mutual self-deluge-ioning.
Time to stock up on candles, lots of them.
~~~~
Reader, BW, flirtatiously challenged me, to poem dual; her lines were sent, they are good; here’s my volley back:
Candle’s light paints you white
as night shadows hide your
gaze from sight then only
I will know how your smile
fed heat of that afterglow.
Daybreak fades as wicks put out
light fades and that is when
fingers touch cheek to remind
resemble when you tremble.
Over to you BW ….
~~~
WHAT GOES AROUND
Life is a circle because
what is wanted is not what is needed
what is needed is not what is deserved
what is deserved is not what is delivered
what is delivered is not what is expected
what is expected is not what is wanted
so, you see
life is a circle.
~~~
Since starting March 21, 2010, I’ve been writing a poem a day for inclusion with this column - sometimes they are connected to the theme du jour, just as often not. Inspiration comes riding in the window on the breeze .... check out the YEAR OF POETRY: archived poetry
~~~
Mark Kolke
315,092M~~
February 3 - Comments Received
February 3 - THAT LEAVES NO OTHER TIME - Oh.. I so agree with you GK it is the most wonderful thing to have been in love and even when it end sadly, there are so many riches that we take with us. As the saying goes, It is so much better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. I look back and smile and remember to most wonderful feelings. I became a better person I think and feel that in our deepest pain there is always a light that shines and we go on, JH Grande Prairie, AB
February 3 - THAT LEAVES NO OTHER TIME / morning reading. I read some. You are good; very thought provoking. I will enjoy. I challenge you to stanza 2 and 4, B, Brooks, AB
Ode To Aging
Oh body you hast let me down,
With sagging flesh and wrinkled frown
Dost thou not want to save my bust
To match my body to my lust?..........
