STILL LIFE, readin’ an writin’
Sunday, February 5, 2023
As a ‘latecomer’ to the world of writing, or should I say ‘attempting to be a serious writer’ later in life than most people, there is a challenge I find, and I have no idea if this is common, rare, or important to anyone. Anyway, it is vital for me.
It’s not the ego thing of wondering if anyone reads, cares, or has an opinion on my writing – that’s a hurdle, albeit a small one, I encountered a long time ago. It comes with realizing whatever age we are, when we pick up the pen or hit keys; it’s not about the reader or the subject matter. It’s the writer, what they do, why they do it, why they must do it and continue to write. It has nothing to do with getting published, selling the work or using it as a stepping stone toward or away from anything.
And yet it is all those things.
Some writers I’ve read and researched had a strong desire and prodigious talent they demonstrated early in life. Some of the greatest writers had the messiest or most uncommon lives. While there is no magic in drunkenness, many writers were drunks and died early or lived a pauper’s life. And artists too.
While I drank heavily in my late twenties and early thirties, I’ve been sober for more than 35 years, so that’s not a recent memory angst reservoir I can draw on as quickly as current circumstances.
Marriages, divorces, and relationships with my children have provided plenty of unresolved angst, but not for public airing openly in my writing – though my daily drive to write doesn’t come from that.
It comes from something else within me – perhaps craft/practice over talent, stream over consciousness, some learned skills and no formal training. I credit a lot of my Toastmasters program work with helping my composition, structure, and impact in writing has been of a more significant benefit than many things I've read or listened to about writing.
Like most adolescent boys, I met Holden Caulfield and most of the issues on the pages of J.D. Salinger’s book. I'm sure that was true of many readers, and we all know the pop-culture lore of crazy people doing horrible acts while clinging to a copy of that book.
It's only for some, but compared to any coming-of-age classic or at least iconic book, it's a colossal success.
That it's widely taught and read by many new readers every year teaches an important lesson, especially against the backdrop of many publishing industry people who wouldn't publish it unless rewritten or that it ought not to be published at all, that it would fail to find an audience or critical acclaim, they were wrong.
He was stubborn, ignored detractors, unrelenting, and fiercely protective of his characters and the thread of the story - defending the legitimacy and values of story elements and character behaviour. Because he was writing about real experiences, ups and many more downs, and he knew what happened, however implausible, because it had happened to him.
Whether you've liked his writing style or subject matter, his writing reads like truth. It may not be strictly accurate or even remotely true. Still, as a reader, you trust the text as if it is inevitable, which is a part suspension of disbelief and part trusting that it is his truthful revelation that if Holden Caulfield was a real boy, that's how he felt.
So, far the only novel published by Salinger, and he published nothing since while he was alive or after his death. He wrote every day. Whether or not his will provides for the future publishing of anything he wrote over several decades is debated but has yet to be revealed.
We watched (for me, it was a re-watching) 'Rebel in the Rye' the other night – where the inconsistencies vis-à-vis documentaries on him and his work were few, and nobody can capture a view, objective or otherwise, of someone’s life as a movie. The movie is not about the book; it's about the writer, which, in disguise, is who the book is about ...
My takeaway from what I’ve learned about Salinger, as I’ve learned about other writers I’ve tried to get smart about, learn from, and understand (Hemingway, Vonnegut, Ephron, Sorkin, Goldman, and others to lesser degrees), is to find my voice, my point of view, and infuse my writing with what I learn. I’ve been struggling, surging, then struggling again with my novel project for several years.
I don’t have the time it needs, but also I need to dig back into that work, not because it requires me to finish what I started, but because I need to work on myself inside those characters as they need to do more work inside of me.
What’s the point?
Salinger, strange as his personality was, had things about him that I’d like to understand better – not so much about the process, but about aligning his life as represented by his characters on the page as they/he were in reality.
In my purely amateur and untrained fashion, there is something I’ve found in writing that goes beyond learning a craft; something more important than the apparent importance of understanding characters and storytelling is understanding the inside of the head of the storyteller. Our society is less drawn to printed books these days, as opposed to e-books, audiobooks, and TV and classic movies have shifted to things streamed and binge-watched – but before any of that happens, a writer somewhere puts keystrokes in action, words fall out, their guts are put on display alongside every failure, disappointment, transgression and faded faint hopes: what could be more exciting to do with time spent putting bits of life on a page …
Each time I go down this thought path, a memory of lunch with my friend Sharon a few years ago comes to mind. It was about this time of year when each year I took some to examine what I was doing with this daily column, writing/publishing, website issues etc. That year I was struggling to continue or not. In that lunch conversation, we’d also been catching each other up on family stuff, our small-town prairie origins, in particular, talking about grandfathers. Then, while we are talking about the future of these columns and things like ‘what is it for, who is it for, and why do I do it?’ … and she interjected with a question about how well we knew our grandfathers. We both answered, ‘barely anything,’ My understanding of mine (he died when I was five) is through stories and photos. I remember his bristly white moustache on my face and bouncing on his knee - but very little else.
Her suggestion then was if you keep writing, one day, your grandchildren might learn more about you by reading what you’ve written. Yes, they might one day …
I’ll add that I’ve done my annual ‘think about Musings future’ and have only one change planned this. Once the ‘20th year of Musings ends on March 19th,’ I’ll discontinue the website and take down the archives, publishing daily by e-mail only (the system keeps archived older columns). Whether some kind of ‘book form’ collection/boiling down is in the cards is only brain-candy, but conversations about that will continue.
Reader feedback:
I think I’ll be fine with 99, SB, Calgary, AB
After today’s musing I thought you would find this entertaining: In case you feel bad about missing your exercise today, ponder this: the inventor of the treadmill died at the age of 54; the inventor of gymnastics died at the age of 57; the world bodybuilding champion died at the age of 41; the best footballer in the world, Maradona, died at the age of 60; James Fuller Fixx, credited with helping start America's fitness revolution by popularizing the sport of running, died of a heart attack while jogging at age 52. But … the KFC inventor died at 94, cigarette maker Charles Winston died at the age of 102; the inventor of opium died at the age of 116, in an earthquake; and the Hennessey Liquor inventor died at 98. How did smart people come to the conclusion that exercise prolongs life? The rabbit is always jumping up and down, but it lives for only two years, and the turtle, that doesn't exercise at all, lives 400 years. Get some rest, chill, stay cool, eat, drink and enjoy your life!. RT, White Rock, BC
Thanks for your keen observations about Thursdays. As one that was born on a Thursday you bring out some interesting characteristics of the day and the people born on this day, DS, Calgary, AB