STEPS TO DEPARTURE
. . . formulating a plan, or actually taking an action?
Wednesday Jan. 1, 2014
Making resolutions or starting revolutions – one is talking about action and other is taking action.
OK, don’t overthrow governments, but maybe overthrowing some same-old ways is a healthy way to start the year.
But a starting point is only a starting point if something actually starts there.
Otherwise it is called STOPPED.
Sometimes it’s called STUCK. Some people call it STUPID. Others might call it: so far, has failed to overcome the power of inertia.
Starting out, starting something . . .
For starters, starting this.
Every start requires that first – action of some kind or a transaction of some kind take place.
Pushing a airplane back from a terminal or a canoe being pushed away from the dock – these are journey steps.
Venturing into newness we are like toddler-wannabes.
Taking tentative first steps.
Into what?
Do we do these things, really?
Who gets on a plane without knowing where it is going?
Who pushes off without at least a plan of heading in some direction – and in that, are we racing toward something or away from something?
I remember once, pulling out of a parking garage in Newport Beach onto the PCH. Lauren was driving and asked “which way should we go?”. At that moment I was thinking a bit like a reader of Frost’s poem – that it didn’t really matter which way we went, an adventure was waiting to be had whichever route we took. That was an outing for day. The next day, just as Frost would have commanded it, the other path got some wear.
Whether our adventure is a single afternoon of ‘what should I do?’ or a whole year of ‘what do I want to intentionally accomplish?’, we have to start.
Time to be off the couch, out the door, leaping . . .
Which path you are taking doesn’t require knowing why or where it will lead – which could be random or deliberate. The key element is that a decision is make, a step is taken and we are on our way on some fresh path that leads from where we were, from the way we were, to where we will be and the way we will be because we made it happen.
Letting go of a connection feels dangerous and exhilarating in the same moment – because some place/person/lifestyle or stopping point is about to be left behind.
On this first day of this new year a fresh journey has commenced.
At the end of this day – don’t’ be stuck in the terminal or waiting on the dock – take a step, however modest, to make this your best year ever. All the years that have gone before are dust, gone, don’t matter now. All you have, all any of us have, is now – this time, right now, this year is in front of us. Take a step . . .
No need to tell me, but tell yourself where you are going.
It might be a full itinerary.
It might be, lets take this road to see where it leads. ere must be adventure down this trail, or if not, then some other trail we can try.
Where are you going?
Please don’t answer “nowhere”.
When tomorrow arrives, will you have moved yourself of anything along at all?
If not, why not?
Mark Kolke
200,128
column written/ published from Calgary
morning walk: -6C / 21F, overcast, fresh blanket of white overnight, brilliant sunshine – invigorating hike up the long hill . . . streets sloppy in light traffic
Comments Received:
Hey Mark, May we both have a sensational 2014! Cheers, RL, Calgary, AB
Wow, the words flow when you are angry and flow they did over the idea of walking from a potentially amazing relationship because of distance. Many relationships seem to start that way in this day and age of the internet. I like what one writer wrote about insurmountable odds: "Drive can triumph even the most insurmountable odds. Drive is manifest by sacrifice; it’s the translation of thought into action, regardless how inconvenient". I guess this is what the expression "Where there is a will, there is a way" refers to. She would be lucky to have you but obviously the drive to make it happen just isn't there. Even though you are a dog with a bone ( an expression that has been used on me as well), I am glad that you have sense to let it go. The hunt continues for you and many others. Good luck in 2014!!, CG, Cobourg, ON
Hi Mark, Coming from the old telephone company, wasn’t distance supposed to be immaterial if we just “reached out and touched someone”? Of course this phrase referred to the quaint Long Distance telephone call. But of course it’s very hard to get to know someone through test messaging or Twitter, for that matter. Doesn’t anyone just call someone anymore to just talk if you can’t be there in person, face-to-face?, DK, Edmonton, AB
Mark - thank you for a great year of musings; before you know it you will be at 4500! A great milestone this year and so many thoughtful, open and honest reflections. I, personally, am looking forward to 2014. I am hopeful it is a prosperous year for all, and one that brings renewed health, happiness and purpose. All the best to you Mark for a great 2014!!! Regards, MK, Calgary, AB
Hi Mark. Waving hello and wishing you health and happiness in 2014. I rarely respond although I enjoy your musings. Regarding your thoughts today . . . I think I’ve learnt that If it’s meant to be it will be. No need to ask someone to cheerfully push a rock uphill who doesn’t want to (no matter how great the view might be if they do) . Love – life - is a journey of mixed experiences (up and down) for sure (I know you know). I think staying in the intuition place, knowing your truth, being open to possibilities and always believing you have choice (if you have your health) . . . is a good foundation. My mum, aged 86, (aging bravely in the UK , without family) has two truisms that she lives by and shares with me. I think she’s onto something: ‘My religion is how I treat my fellow man’ – and, ‘ Prize relationships above all’. JH, Kelowna, BC
Hi Mark, I was sorry to read, for all kinds of reasons, that you missed out on a chance at romance in the last few days for a reason like distance, not an ideal way to end 2013. I do hope you have better luck in 2014. Happy New Year!, LW, Canmore, AB
The only limits we have are those we set for ourselves; the only boundaries we encounter are those we imagine (most of the time). To give a female perspective of which I do not subscribe is a lot of women are manipulative. I see the comment regarding distance between two people getting to know each other as insurmountable to be just that, a manipulative ploy. Perchance looking for a declaration that crossing the distance to reach that person would be well worth the effort. Distance in the beginning stages of a relationship virtually eliminates the temptations of the flesh and allows one to focus on getting to truly know that person intimately without the touchy feely kind rearing its' ugly head before you get a chance to uncover certain personality issues. I would say some were uncovered. Glad you can move on without beating yourself up over something you have no control over. Good going! GW, Brady, Tx.
