Who to tell, what to tell, what not to tell and when to just shut up and say nothing – an interesting challenge – amusing exercise if parties we are dealing with don’t matter.
No so simple when they do …
The microscopic truth, nitty-gritty kind, supposedly easy to tell to someone close, someone trusted, someone accepting and non-judgmental. I’ve tried it, and I certify it is tricky.
Most important of all, sometimes it matters.
Sometime not. But how do we know?
It is however a tricky to tell whole fulsome truth, full truth and clear truth without leaving out important bits. Context bits. Background bits. Other bits that matter, which contribute to understanding. Things you wouldn’t tell a stranger, but certainly things you would tell someone close. Things you wouldn’t leave out. Sometimes uncomfortable to talk about or to publicly disclose, but essential to understanding. Sometimes in dribbles over time, sometimes a full-on data dump. Too much information? Not enough? Too soon? Or too late?
Timing is an element of every human interaction, but tricky to know how anyone will respond to unexpected dialogue. Which is not to say people we know are predictable, but people we don’t know never are.
More than all of this, if I’ve learned anything at all from my many bumps and lumps in relationships both personal and business which fell off the rails it is these two principles:
truth telling is a foundational building block to anything meaningful and lasting
over-disclosure never destroys a good relationship while under-disclosure never builds something strong and lasting