LIFE LESSONS
… just not enough time to learn them all until we are running out …
Wednesday June 4, 2014
I remember.
From childhood: let that be a lesson to you
I’m a slow learner!
Thoughts this week, by recollections of someone’s story.
Myra’s.
I interviewed her in February. Dying of cancer. She died in late April. My writing-up of that piece, capturing interview of Myra, discussions with her daughter and explaining the point, the lesson of it all, were delayed.
Editor was understanding (it’s a volunteer gig), considerate of my situation – death and après-death matters of my dad, reeling still from Gary’s-end in January.
Time, on my side.
Not on Myra’s.
DRAFT e-mailed o my Cancer Society editor Sunday evening. Waiting, impatiently, for feedback.
What’s taking so long? I know it took me three months to produce my DRAFT. Seriously, I want instant feedback – to know if it was good, or better than good, to know if it flows well to someone who is a stranger to the story. I want to know.
Want to know now.
People are busy. Everyone, time constrained.
And I was late.
Let that be a lesson to me!
All our lives we take time – months, sometimes years – to accomplish difficult tasks, yet we expect instant feedback, reaction.
I have no time for wasting.
It evaporates faster – which I know isn’t true, but it seems faster.
I’ve heard that from older people as long as I remember.
I still think myself young. Not because now I might be considered old people.
I don’t think time got shorter.
I’m convinced it isn’t because we cram so much more into our available time. Sure we do, but that’s just normal for everyone.
Technology helps lots but that isn’t it.
Something else.
At this stage of life – not a particular birthday, but some sort of phase/appreciation, differently. Comes from those losses of late, maybe perspective changes. Appreciating in part, time’s great value. Lost instantly when missed …
I’ve seen too many people lately simply run out.
Not like sugar. Can’t go next door to borrow some.
Something lost. Cannot replace it at a store, buy on-line or acquire in a merger . . .
When time is up in sports, we go into overtime.
When time is up in life – we are over.
Not preoccupied with death and dying – but since I’ve had some going on, I might as well learn something from my experience.
So, what have I learned?
I’ve learned I’ve dismissed too many things, and possibly too many people, as not valuable in my life. Of course they are valuable! But the weren’t valuable enough to me to invest that extra time.
That is a lesson.
I’ve learned that I could have done so many things so much better – that now I try, very hard, to get better at something every day. I try to get more out of things. I try to put more of me into things. That is draining, exhausting and takes more time.
That is a lesson.
I’ve learned, better than ever, more fully than ever – the value of connections. I’ve left far too many of them withering …
I’ve been re-connecting, re-nourishing some of those.
I’ll likely not succeed on many, but I’ll succeed with some.
I see that as far better use of time than I used to.
That is a lesson.
Mark Kolke
197,432
column written/ published from Calgary
morning walk: 10C/49F, mostly cloudy yet sun peeking through, everything soggy (including Gusta) from overnight showers; early risers making traffic hum and a train went by, a Magpie taunted/tempted Gusta …. but it could hop away faster than Gusta could lunge and I trailed along behind.
Reader feedback / comments always welcome:
Thank you so much for all your insightful messages. Keep me posted, AS, West Los Angeles, CA
Loved it! Brilliant idea, interviewing yourself! I learned a few things about you myself. Observation - apart from Gloria Steinem, your named influences were all men (with a first name starting with B) but later you say you love interesting women. Not a contradiction, just interesting. Well done - hope it didn't take you all night. It was well written and interesting. Have a great day!, CM, Calgary, AB
