|
WHAT DRIVES US
... so much, obviously, won’t be completed today …
Saturday Mar. 29, 2014
Are we what we do, what we’ve done, have, or what we chase?
What drives us?
Fatigue – doesn’t so much come, go.
Constant.
20-25 years seems accurate.
Yesterday – physical (not enough sleep, no time for gym), mental (not enough sleep, stress-inducing hectic week, moving potential along – more on plate than in quite a while – good, wearying), empathetic (not enough sleep, long overdue lunch with KK, afternoon of gratitude - see below**), emotional (not enough sleep, did I mention my dad died 3 weeks ago), intellectual (not enough sleep, I really couldn’t follow plot/characters in ‘Travels with my Aunt’ last night at Vertigo Theatre), digestive (not enough sleep, too much restaurant food – last night at Milestones, décor tired, place grimy. Seafood fettuccini was superb, service friendly and professional – bit tip earned, paid).
Today – getting things done, farmers’ markets – then sleeping.
Slept late, planning siesta.
Tall work pile.
Writing 2 pieces.
Gym.
Newsletter prep, brewing stock, preparing dinner-in (sautéed clams, mushrooms and 4 kinds of onions and linguini), early to bed, intoxicating sleep …
What produces, sustains drive?
Emotional – not physical – stimulation of senses, emotional energy keeps me live.
Sleep isn’t commodity – I am.
I know who I am, but who are – what defines – you?
** Interview with KK/friend/colleague/mentor – o’ – mine, got close to bone. Both. Sprinted to ‘Gratitude’ celebration at Fresh Start. Outpoured love and support for 10 men who could just as easily be plying a gutter near you. They’ve done some time, re-figuring purpose, value in their lives. Not getting 2nd chances. They’ve used 2nd and 3rd and 4th long ago. Earned their fresh start. Looks good from where I sit.
Mark Kolke
198,040
column written/ published from Calgary
morning walk: -11C / 12F (according to the forecast we have 3 more days of lingering cold before we get typical spring-temps), very fresh, dare I say humid feeling, overcast, negligible breeze, sleep-in quiet around the neighbourhood, some magpies bothering some squirrels, traction decent – energy level rising
Reader feedback / comments always welcome:
When I saw you the other day in the Plus 15 it jogged my memory that I saw in your blog that your dad passed away. Please accept my deepest condolences, GC, Calgary, AB
|
|
