IN MORNING, DARKNESS
Sunday Mar. 19, 2017
Don’t call.
Don’t stop by.
Don’t even think of trying …
Still, peace and quiet compete with noises inside. Never speaking aloud, never reaching anyone’s ears – just my years colliding with my dreams, my hopes, my needs, my yearnings – reaching skyward while me feet remain somewhat near the ground. I’ve known joy and peace, known clarity and known conflicts; not unique, I’m normal.
You’re normal too …
OK, maybe not everyone.
What sets us up, sets us apart, sets us free – is peace in our mind, when we are clear of thought and self-directed of purpose. For me, this is that time. This is morning. It is fine. It is quiet. World still turning. If you look down closely, you’ll see my waving arms – doing something to make it better or clearer in some ways – trying. In the quiet of my morning, alone with my thoughts. Not pleased always with this alone part. Need someone who wants their morning to start alongside mine. Thought I’d found rare gem but it seems to not be true. Hope remains alive. So are dreams. And arms – open to embrace whatever comes next …
Every thought stands bare, not wrapped in pretense or illusion, not draped in society’s clothes or expectations – just there, bare and aware. If I had a ‘higher power’ or belief book philosophy – this would be my when and where. Here in this morning’s darkness – with my coffee and my quiet.
Morning is quiet time – mostly. Not my only quiet time – but morning doesn’t have to be made quiet. No need to turn something down or off or sequester myself away – quiet just is. Is quiet, is solitude, is magical …
I don’t worship as many do – but if I did, I would worship quiet and solitude just as passionately as I celebrate their opposites. I love noise, I love being with people, I love being alone with someone special. Opposites, not extremes, bring contrast to life and to light – illustrate our boundaries of joys and pains. Juxtaposed …
Can’t impose deadlines on feelings – mine or anyone’s – still, there comes time for examining circumstances and passage of time conspire to bring thinking to a head, bring issues into focus and feelings to a crux-point when we say, “enough of this, it is time” and we confront whatever obstacle(s), issues or people blocking our path. Sometime that means choosing a different path. Sometimes it means burning some bridges. Or blowing some up. When it is stormy, I need a quiet peaceful solitude spot to clear head and plate. Clear headed space. Quiet space. This time. This place.
Reader feedback:
ONE BIG PUSH
Good morning Mark. I am not sure if you have heard of the Kaizen approach. I think of it a small incremental changes every day. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kaizen. Over time your surroundings will be very different. This is a constant and ongoing process, MM, Calgary, AB
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