FORCE OF HABIT
Tuesday, November 1, 2022
We measure the power of things in words like horsepower, rocketry thrust, and the physics of getting a plane off the ground. We talk of power in terms of an electorate, a management philosophy, or the invisible hand of the people moving together to shape the economy and trends that move it one way or another. Or when we watch a school of fish turn in unison or a flight of migratory birds performing in the sky like an art form, habit is at work – there is a habit, a force, and a focus.
And there is a force of habit.
We often use this phrase as an excuse or explanation for some idiosyncratic thing we do, and we toss it off with a comment like, “Oh, it’s just a force of habit.”
But habits do possess force. Forces for good or not so good. They serve little value, though, if we don’t think about them and examine their power.
Let’s talk about the force of habit, the value of habit, and whether yours align with what you want.
Don’t worry, I’m not writing about nun humour, but a different kind of changing one’s habit(s).
Habit forming.
Habit re-forming.
Habit by design.
Habit re-invention.
Habits left alone v. habit left behind …
I’ve learned both extremes of this – lived it – the positive and negative forms of a habit, about focus.
What we focus on expands.
That’s a generalization. However, while simplistic, it is more than a one-word elegant solution because we have so many examples we can question ourselves on – and I’ve found it rings true. Each time I debrief and dissect a success, at the root, every step of the way, is about focus.
Each time I do a similar analysis – quickly or deep-diving, every failed effort, grande-scale or small, cannot be explained convincingly with all the typical excuses of ‘wrong person,’ ‘wrong timing,’ or ‘they had a relationship with someone else I couldn’t compete with’ – it comes down to our lack of focus, or focusing on the wrong things at a time when something else was critically important. NOTE: I’m using words that impact my work, but this kind of question can be asked by anyone, whatever they do. I sell goods and services, focusing on real estate, properties and projects, executing transactions and providing consulting advice. If I were a rocket surgeon or running a bakery or developing software, some technical words would be different. Still, focus, quality of focus, would be at the root of every success story, and lack of quality focus would underscore every failing grade.
But is that truth, or are we merely being selective in which things we choose to examine vs. which ones we deflect and avoid giving that kind of scrutiny?
I find it useful, but not so much for measuring results – does the amount of focus magnify the rewards?
Sometimes, maybe it does.
I think the expansion relationship with concentration is actual and likely measurable, but what I’m driving at here is the differences in what we are focusing on and why we are focusing on it – and the byproduct of expansion is easy to understand, but it is no predictor of results.
If we are focused on health, is that focusing on a healthy lifestyle, diet, foods, and exercise? If it is, we probably get a positive boost in our positive feelings and, if sustained, likely contributes to extending the length and quality of our life, so YAY for focusing – it has benefits!
Conversely, if that focus is on a health problem, an illness issue rather than a wellness one, that can take one down a rabbit hole of only half-truths, half-truth gossip with fellow worriers – or, it’s simply hypochondria …
What we focus on is an easily proven concept.
What is tricky and far less straightforward is focusing on things which are good personal, professional and relationship habits to be formed, enhanced, and which will benefit from to the exclusion of distracting, negative, time-wasting and undermining activities – these are the kinds of focus and expansion I like.
Yes, what we focus on expands.
Are you focusing on good things for yourself, your relationships, career, family, lifestyle and quality of life?
The next step of the question, if your answer is NO, is why?
And, as you ponder that one, ask this simple question that has so much to do with being effective – it makes THE difference for all of us every day. Don’t be intimidated by that; it’s a really simple question, and the answer is multiple-choice, there are only two possible answers.
You can answer YES, or NO. What could be simpler?
The question, “Are your habits aligned with your focus?”
So, which are you, a YES, or NO?
This matters a lot, whether you are a YES or NO, because how can we expect to use this magical tool of FOCUS to expand our life if that focus does not align with your dreams, with living a successful life, with spreading some happiness around, and contributing to the well-being of your world, your community, your friends and family, your colleagues and neighbours?”
And remember ~
What we focus on expands.
What we focus on expands.
What we focus on expands.
It’s a simple habit, and we can own it if we make it a force of habit.
Reader feedback:
As you know, that was a very emotional evening for me, from the appearance of the chair and oxygen until the last moment. I was expecting to feel a sense of celebration—to look at his age and admire what he can still do. But I didn’t. Because he no longer can. I wanted him to have a feeling of accomplishment and joy, but I doubt he did. I wanted to tell everyone to go home and listen to their old records and CDs so he could rest. If the day comes when I can no longer do my job well, I hope I have the wisdom to walk away with dignity. Mr. Lightfoot’s day has come, HM, Calgary, AB
Mark, I'm not sure when you posted this piece, but I found it just now. From my perspective, this is one of the most beautifully written blogs you've put on line - and there have been so many. I'm sorry I missed the concert - or maybe I'm glad I wasn't there. But we're fortunate you witnessed this memorial and chronicled the event for all of us. Thank you, CB, Calgary, AG
#writersworld “I can say that better, clearer.” …. Oh! I was in my own little world, remarking on the #writersworld I had just written. In other clearer words, I meant as writers we are always trying to say things clearer and better than the last pass. Please forgive my foggy response to your excellent piece. I love reading your work every day, LP, Laguna Niguel, CA
|