I HAVE NO BUCKET LIST
Saturday Oct. 4, 2014
I have no bucket.
Just a growing list informs my path.
No-holds-barred, take-no-prisoners, no mission-statement, but plenty of clarity.
Live, play, work.
Not separate things, but parts of my whole.
Note to self …
Call meeting.
Agenda:
Organize thoughts, do full-blown presentation of goals and objectives. Do SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats) analysis, focus on opportunities.
Take a vote.
Act.
Keep minutes.
Minutes: early on October 4th, 2014, a meeting of Mark was convened. A quorum of one (1) in attendance, the meeting was not opened with a mission statement reading, anthem singing, flag saluting or any kind of recitation. The room went quiet – everyone there was waiting for sounds of a break-through. Only motion on the floor for consideration: be it resolved that nothing will stand in the way of this life, that fear will be set aside, caution will tossed to the breeze and refreshing change will unfold. Passed. There being no other business, the meeting was adjourned sini die at 7:17AM.
I wrestle with this term bucket list and more-so what it means to have one. For most people who speak the term, they use it in reference to the movie by that name or when talking about someone who got them to pause, pay attention to or describe all things they want to do before they die: those trips not taken, un-met goals, not-done deeds.
Less about getting than giving. More about experiences for sharing than about great daring. Scaring. Scary. Not the deeds, but that time runs out. Is running out. Not to say we are running on empty, but time is getting shorter from both ends. First, the days we waste. Second, the days available for doing all those things shorten from the other end when our strength, agility, stamina and capacity will evaporate.
Journey, one that begins with a single step type, is both misnomer and underestimation.
Like a road-trip, the journey has many distractions in every mile, many options in every mile. Turning around, going back and re-tracing our steps is something we rarely do. Going forward, outward, onward – those are words we use. Progress, improvement, growth – we use those words too.
Most people on our path are not there to enable our journey – they struggle to find their own way through maze and labyrinth of their own. Is there time to show gratitude? For everyone who ever gave us anything in life – do we have time, is there enough money, to show them our thanks? Of course not.
Take a trip, by plane or ship, check hotel lobbies, inspect malls or tourist strolls. Everywhere there are gift shops. From overpriced trinkets to objets d'art, best gifts for giving or receiving do not come from the gift shop.
But, what is it all about?
If we are deliberate, focused and driven – will that get us to our goal, our destination, our dream? Or is wandering aimlessly and bumping into things – stopping at ones that intrigue us, is that the ticket?
I have a few things colliding. Some, simply because I have put them off. Some have deadlines. Some have barely started. Some are nearly finished.
My arrangements are not made, my plans are disheveled, my goals are scrambled like delicious eggs. There is an easy calculation to what I must do. There is no end to what I want to do, yearn to do … as I have just begun to live.
My affairs are not in order … therefore I cannot die.
I have a will. Actually not that kind of will (though I am working on a loose set of instructions) that requires anyone to do anything when I am gone.
My will is a different type.
A will to live, grow, change, do, think, believe, experiment and thrive.
Mark Kolke
column written/ published from Calgary
morning walk: 13C/56F, strangely mild considering recent days … rabbits everywhere this morning (where are the coyotes?). Traffic humming-light, dawn breaking, my sore-back needs a workout and a steam …