Could be immediate, might be delayed. Sometimes choices lift, elevate, ‘float us’ to tomorrow. When that happens, that moment of realization is ‘instantaneous’.
So too, things which push buttons, trigger emotions – stop us in our tracks.
Uncomplicated choices rarely are uncomplicated.
There is the choice we make, the choice we might have made, the choice we refused to make and the choice of ‘not making any choice’ at all at that time, which should not be confused with indecision.
Most of our emotions don’t feel like decisions. Blink of an aye. Or nay. Auto-matic, instantaneous, reflexive. Nanoseconds of thought-time we wear our emotions like we wear clothing.
We may not act like jerks but our knees might. We function in this collage of reasons, rationale, raison d’etre. Rational, irrational – we know these terms, we feel feelings – we justify actions, push square pegs of action into round cavities, trying for fit, like jigsaw puzzle pieces. Colours are right, shape is right but fit isn’t quite there. Not yet. Maybe never.
Aniis Nin said: “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.”
These are poet words, not physics law; reality of feelings, not science.
Pain or joy? Pick. Easy, right?
Pain or joy or love or hate or life or death?
Pick four – but only four or those six. Not less, not more.
Not so simple*, is it?
What does the future look like?
In the fullness of time, we’ll see …
*sure it’s simple: love, joy, life, pain. We should always expect some doses of pain in its various forms – otherwise it isn’t a full life. Easy answer.
Go get em’ (her!) Mark. Many blessings. Love your work, BE, Calgary, AB
Hello Mark, I do not know how or why but one day I started receiving your daily musings in my work mail and I just want to say that it really really makes my day. Sometimes coming to work is hard, I do not find the joy in it or the motivation, and then I read your musings and it not only makes me smile but puts my brain gears in motion, I feel a little bit more inspired and it has even started a process of introspection. English is my second language so you will have to forgive me if I am not very eloquent, if I struggle to find the words to express myself. I hope your first date goes very well, and I am sure you will have her smiling from ear to ear. Sincerely, PA, Calgary, AB
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