Unless we are at cliff’s edge, which makes an entirely different construct.
Most missed opportunities aren’t revisited; grab them as they present themselves.
The terminated relationship or the bridge blown-up, however, is another matter entirely.
Why dive deep with some people, and why just skim the surface with others?
Is it something we do, something they do or some great recipe that is ‘just right’?
Recipes can be repeated, replicated, and recreated with the same ingredients and sometimes with substitutes. But human relationships seem to need something else. Some intangible secret sauce.
Explaining the successful, the tasty, and the easy isn’t much challenge.
It’s relationships gone sour – often one that wasn’t very sweet to begin with. We can plant sweetness-seeds in every one of them and not fix much because, sometimes, it’s them. Not us, but them. They suck us dry emotionally and use the one-sided neediness, mix it with some false-flattery, and expect us to fall for it. We recognize it when it happens, because we’ve seen this movie before. We know what it looks like, feels like, and we know how it ends. Then, time for dynamite, blow up the bridge and move on.
Dynamite should be used carefully, there is no way to rebuild a blown-up bridge.
Sometimes blowing it up is a huge mistake. Sometimes, the perfect thing to do – and then move on.
A better rule: to build one new bridge every day. Just because.
Then, on days when you blow up a bridge, build two new ones.